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RIP The Loch Ness Monster

February 19th, 2009 at 03:09pm

Continuing our not-quite-as-regular-as-I-had-envisaged feature on all of the terrible, horrible and downright awful things which are either claimed to have occurreed, or predicted to occur, due to global warming climate change (I can’t decide which one to us…the earth is cooling but we’re still hearing about the supposed effects of it warming), it seems that dear old Nessie is a victim of global warming climate change.

LEGENDARY Nessie hunter Robert Rines is giving up his search for the monster after 37 years.
[..]
World War II veteran Robert has devoted almost half his life to scouring Loch Ness.

He started in 1971. The following year, he watched a 25ft-long hump with the texture of elephant skin gliding through the water.

His original trip was to help another monster hunter with sonar equipment and quickly identified large moving targets.

He was smitten and returned the next year, which is when, he says: “I had the misfortune of seeing one of these things with my own eyes.”

Since then, he has been obsessed with tracking down the creature with a staggering array of hi-tech equipment. It was this gear that took the famous “flipper” picture that year which created a stir around the world.

Despite having hundreds of sonar contacts over the years, the trail has since gone cold and Rines believes that Nessie may be dead, a victim of global warming.

He still wants to check almost 100 contacts on the floor of the loch, believing one may be the monster’s remains.

This is surely one of the more outrageous claims relating to planetary heating (hmmm, that’s a good name for it), especially seeing as no evidence is supplied to back up the claim…although why would we need evidence if we can just blame planetary heating (oh, you didn’t like the name?) climate change.

In 1975, the trained physicist and inventor managed to get a photograph in the murky waters of the loch which apparently showed the body, flipper, neck and head of an animal.

Oh, silly me there is proof, he’s a “trained physicist”, well that’s good enough for me. Somebody get out the freezer and the pacemaker…we have a monster to cool down and bring back to life!

Samuel

Entry Filed under: Global Warming

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